Sunday November 14, 1999

'Pokemon' Mania Spreads to Box Office

By Dean Goodman

The children's cartoon, based on a Nintendo game that has devolved into merchandising

phenomenon, opened at No. 1 with an estimated $32.4 million for the Friday-Sunday period, said

Warner Bros. distribution president Dan Fellman.

Toronto and San Francisco, he said.

''Pokemon's'' staggering $10,647.

Both ``Anywhere But Here'' and ``Light It Up'' were released by Twentieth Century Fox.

The top 10 movies at the box office

1 (+) Pokemon: The First Movie ......... $32.4 million

2 (1) The Bone Collector ............... $12.0 million

3 (+) Dogma ............................ $8.8 million

4 (+) The Messenger .................... $6.3 million

5 (+) Anywhere But Here ................ $5.7 million

6 (4) The Insider ...................... $5.1 million

7 (3) The Bachelor ..................... $4.7 million

8 (2) House on Haunted Hill ............ $4.4 million

9 (6) Double Jeopardy .................. $3.1 million

10 (8) The Sixth Sense .................. $2.7 million

NOTE: Last weekend's position in parenthesis. + - new release.

Pokemon: The First Movie and House on Haunted Hill are released by Warner Bros., and The

Bachelor by New Line Cinema, both units of Time Warner Inc (NYSE:TWX - news).

The Bone Collector is released by Universal Pictures, a unit of Seagram Co. Ltd.

Dogma is released by Lions Gate Entertainment.

Anywhere But Here and Light It Up are released by Twentieth Century Fox, a unit of Fox

Entertainment Group Inc (NYSE:FOX - news).

The Insider is released by Touchstone Pictures, and The Sixth Sense by Hollywood Pictures, both

units of Walt Disney Co.

The Messenger: The Story of Joan of Arc is released by Columbia Pictures, a unit of Sony Corp

(NYSE:SNE - news).

Double Jeopardy is released by Paramount Pictures, a unit of Viacom Inc (NYSE:VIA - news).

Reuters/Variety

JOHN L.: Lots and lots to talk about this week. This was a fairly huge weekend at the box office… if you are 6-10 years old. It was Hell if you were a parent or babysitter or guardian or step parent or live in boyfriend of a 6-10 year old. If you are Agnostic, it was exciting, but if you are Catholic, you are pissed off. If you like your history butch style, then this weekend was cool. If you are looking for the La Femme d'Element Nikita you were probably disappointed. If you are looking for Princess Amidala meets Jane the Slut, then you came out on top. If you are looking for a Thelma and Louise meets the Professional then you stayed home. And if you were looking for John Malkovich, if you were L.A. or New York, you have already seen him, and if you live in northeast Ohio, you are still being kicked in the nads when it comes to limited release movies coming out in your area.

Wonder Twin Powers activate! Scooby snacks. New Zoo Revue coming right at you. Johnny Socko. Speed Racer. Godzilla vs Megalon. Tom and Jerry. Be vewwy vewwy quiet, I'm hunting wabbits. What the heck is Goofy anyway? It's the Muppet Show with our special guest, Christopher Reeve, waaaaaaaa! One of these things is not like the other. Spins a web any size, catches thieves just like flies. You wouldn't like me when I'm angry. Oh the pain the pain. Warp factor 3 Mr. Sulu. These are just a few examples of things that got me excited when I heard them when I was a kid. Nowadays it's Pikachu is cool. I need a Charizard. Mommy, can we go to Burger King again? I heard there is a secret Mewthree card that was misprinted and is now worth $10,000. This week, the North American public was subjected to the Japanese Pocket Monsters known as POKEMON!! This was the week we were supposed to celebrate the sacrifices our war veterans made to preserve the freedoms we have in this country, but all it meant to Warner Brothers Studios was that millions of kids would have the day off during the middle of the week to go see Pokemon: The first Movie and get millions upon millions of dollars. I guess we live in good times if that is all we have to worry about now is if Mewtwo will succeed in taking over the world and not whether some dictator wants to exterminate or control people. The pundits and experts cannot figure out why this poorly animated, poorly dubbed, poorly written, and very Magic the Gathering ripoffery import is so popular with the youngins. I am not an expert or pundit on the Pokemon craze. I am familiar with the videogames and cards and know of the tv show, but I have never played the card game or watched the television program and have only played the Nintendo 64 Pokemon Snap video game for about 2 minutes. However, I do have some ideas why this thing has captured the free time of grade schoolers. Here we go in in no particular order:

1. The three pronged attack: There is a video game, a tv show, and a card game. Kids have loved video games for the last 20 years. A fun interactive game will usually make money. Kids have love tv since the days of radio. Kids like having action stories told to them and animated. Card games have been part of the culture for longer than I can research, and this game is very similar to the Magic the Gathering game where you have these imaginary battles between monsters and the like. The game makes you feel like you are the pocketmonster or it is up to you to train a monster so that he can learn new powers and increase their strength.
2. Pocketmonsters are like pets that don't make that mess on the floor you have to clean up. A few years ago the tamagotchis were hot because they were these virtual pets you had to fake feed, fake play with,and fake support without any real commitment. All the fun without the responsibility. With Pokemon, you train these creatures like they are your pets, but these type of pets don't exist in the real world so it makes it more fun and fantastical. Kids enjoy the world of fantasy adventure.
3. Pokemon is another language that only the ones who play it understand which drives their parents crazy. Kids love their parents and if you ever see a little kid lost in the mall they are always crying and redfaced because they think their mommy and daddy are never coming back to feed them and wipe their buttocks. However, it is a kid's job to drive their parents crazy and if they can find something that only they understand and not their parents, it gives them a certain power over them. Also, kids love to talk about all the fun crap they do all day. If a parent asks them how was school, they say it was fine and they go back to eating their boogers. But, if a parent says, could you explain to me what this Pokemon thing is, then the kid lights up because now they can teach their parents something and not the other way around. Also, if a parent can show some interest in what their child is truly doing, then maybe you can have a kid that won't become alienated and dump you in a nursing home when you turn 65.
4. Violence sells. Kids love to fight and play fight with each other. The problem is that if you fight for real you get hurt and may not be able to fight anymore, but if you fake fight, you can do it over and over again and let out frustration without anyone getting injured. The pocketmonsters have these powers they use in battle that are fun to look at at and say and use. A defeated PM does not die but gets knocked out or stunned to fight again later. Most kids know it is fantasy and that if you really did fight, you could injure someone permanently, and that is no fun. Fighting games are some of the most popular forms of entertainment to ever exist and they are popular because it is cool to look at someone get pummeled, but it is cooler to be able to see it again and again. However, kids, and adults must know that as the Pokemon movie says at the end, fighting is not the answer, but it's what's in your heart that counts. Yeah, right.
5. Gotta catch 'em all! That is the catchphrase. The kids are on the quest to collect all 151+ Pokemon. And they keep adding more all the time. Collecting things is another childhood pastime that has been around since before the pharoahs of Egypt. Comic books, baseball cards, coins, vases, model trains, drying machine lint have all been saved by various people over the years. Pokemon are advertised as a collectible so that makes them must haves. They said the same things about Transformers, Cabbage Patch Dolls, Mutant Turtles, Power Rangers, Tickle Me Elmo, and Furby. Now they all suck. Will PMs be around a year or two from now. Hard to tell. We should know when Pokemon: the 2^nd movie comes out next year. If it can repeat the $51 million 5 day total of the 1^st one, then we may be in for a long ride of pokeman fever. For me, I would give anything for a working Sit-N-Spin.

Kevin Smith Strikes again with his biggest hit ever. I believe this movie has made more than Clerks and Mallrats combined and is on its way to beating the box office of Chasing Amy. It doesn't mean anything because KS's fan base is loyal but small. Everybody that sees this comic book collector's movies seem to expunge their goo all over them. Smith writes that clever witty dialogue that makes you think and observe common abnormalities in life that you might pass off as normal but in reality are bizarre. After seeing clerks, I never looked at Imperial construction engineers the same again. This time, Smith takes on the hypocrisy of the Catholic religion and it has pissed off the church. Protests always help bring attention and modest box office to movies, but it all comes down to if the actual product is scandalous or not. Unfortunately, movie makers do not know how to capitalize on controversy. The Catholic church had signs and pickets saying that Dogma is sacreligious and makes fun of the God. I don't think King James had Alanis Morissette in mind when he wrote his version of the Bible. However, when they interview the cast, and especially Smith, they say that it is really not anti religious but just a certain perspective on religious canon and "dogma." What a dope. If someone asks if your movie is anti religious you say yes! If you are going to make a religious satire, go all out and have the "grapefruits" to say that you made the movie to shake things up and expose the problems with the church. If you are comfortable enough with your beliefs, then see this movie and you might want to rethink them. Wussing out means 8.8 million, going all out means 18.8 million. Do the math.

I have a message for Luc Besson and Milla Jovavich. No one cares about Joan d'Arc. She was a lunatic jobber who got burned at the stake. She had a strong belief and faith in God, and it got her nothing but a taste of Hell. The Joan of Arc story was played out when that chick from the Go-Gos portrayed her in Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure. I have never studied the story of the young female warrior and know practically nothing about Joan except that she was burned to death for heresy and other war atrocities. She was later called a Saint to honor her efforts in fighting the English. It is a somewhat interesting story and is the type that more little girls should have knowledge of, but much like Braveheart, the hero dies at the end. No one wants to see historic stories where the hero is defeated and killed at the end. Braveheart won 4 Oscars, but was not a box office hit. People saw it on video and cable. Messenger is a tragic story which ends horribly. I say this every week. True stories play better on television and not movie theaters. Joan of Arc was a successful NBC miniseries earlier this year. I believe Isabella Rosselini’s mom played her in a movie once. The story has been told before, we get the point. Milla J. is an attractive model who does not put an ass in a movie seat. Fifth Element fell short, and her romp in He’s Got Game did nothing for the box office. One day she might get over, but it has not come yet. Hollywood is a cruel place. Her butch haircut did not help things either. She looks like John of Ark in the previews. Luc Besson has talent as a director, but his visions are not very receptive to the average moviegoer. Maybe next time guys.

Anywhere but Here lived up to its name this week as people were anywhere but in the cineplex watching Sarandon playing the same character she has been playing the last few years like in Stepmom from last year. Natalie Portman is one of those up and coming young starletts that is getting a big push. The Hollywood critics think she is a darling who everyone will love and flock to their movies. Sort of the Gwenyth Mira Liv promotion. They thought her stint as Luke Skywalker’s mom would get her over, but Star Wars fans don’t do mom and daughter 3 hankie fests. If they wanted to attract that Star Wars crowd, Portman needed to wear some more of that Geisha outfit and Sarandon needs to wear her Rocky Horror Picture Show bra and panties. They do that, then you are looking at 15 million instead of 5. It would also help if there were some previews that were shown somewhere and some proper marketing and promotion. Where is my Natalie Portman collector cup? Where is my Susan Sarandon veggie meal? Susan sits there and cannot understand why her movies bomb and Japanese cheapies make $50 million. Super box office is based on premise, gimmick, actors, plot, and promotion. ABH had none of this so they were forced to open poorly. Next time we can get Rene Zellweger, Julia Roberts, and Portman to play the daughters of Susan Saraandon who has a sister played by Meryl Streep. Only box office draw there is Roberts, but it might be enough to break even.

Light it up opened in 12^th place with $2.5 million. A school is held hostage by students who are protesting the firing of their favorite teacher. Along the way a cop gets shot in the leg and from reviews I have read, one of the kids get shot. Also that blonde VJ chick from MTV who’s name I can’t pronounce or spell is in it as a news reporter. Usher, the famous singer who also cameoed in The Faculty stars as the head student causing the trouble. School violence movies are not that hot right now because you can see it on the news most of the time. Realism rarely works in movies, and this one is not very realistic, but it has a touch of hitting too close to home due to recent events as of this writing. No one wants to see reality in movies, that is why they go. The most unrealistic movie ever made is #1 this week. Every other movie based in reality has bombed. Fantasy wins everytime. But Titanic made $1.8 billion worldwide and was based on a real story. Watch the movie again, it is based in a fantasy world all it’s own. Judd Nelson plays the well liked history teacher who is fired. He left Suddenly Susan to do movies like this. What a dope. Forest Whitaker is a pretty good actor who has been a favorite of mine since Fast Times at Ridgemont High. But he never stars in movies anymore. He does have Ghost Dog: The Way of the Samurai coming out soon. Oboy. Here is the lesson of LIU. All schools should have up to date books, a well built school, and support good and well liked teachers who encourage learning. Get it? Good.

1. The Bone Collector has some staying power, but it will top off around $50 million keeping Denzel as a box office jabroni.
2. Angelina Jolie’s lips are still getting in the way of her reaching the level of her father who gets blow jobs from guys in movie theaters, eaten by snakes, and watch Ned Beatty get raped in the woods.
3. The Insider is staying on the outside of the top 5 at the B.O. and it is fairing poorly.
4. Smoking is bad for your health, and all I can say about that is … duh.
5. The Bachelor is getting formally separated from a chance of breaking even.
6. Looks like Mariah Carey’s movie career has not really begun yet.
7. House on Haunted Hill is haning in there better than expected.
8. House on Haunted Hill still probably sucks
9. Ashley Judd is falling out of the top ten, but she should make a killing in her salary for her next picture.
10. This should be Sixth Sense’s last week in the top ten, and I say Bruce, we hardly knew ya.

That’s it for this week. Next week is Bond James Bond week. I may even have a review of it posted as well. End of Days and Toy Story 2 are coming soon as well and I plan to see and review those. Bye for now.